BIONICLE FANFIC! BY WHIMSY
Apr 2, 2009 2:08:44 GMT -5
Post by DEATH PANDA on Apr 2, 2009 2:08:44 GMT -5
BIONICLE fanfic! Watch as I use a pretentious and condescending writing style and mess about with details of the franchise! also to minimise tl;dr I have got an idea- alternate the text colors! let's see how well it works
CHAPTER 1
"Twas in the 5073rd year of Our Great Spirit that this now beauteous island of Dhol was blessed by a visit of a squadron of Toa who set foot here with the objective of cleaning the island of Deviants and of establishing a Matoran community with the assistance of Matoran from other lands" So read the inscription on the slab that Whimsy was standing in front of. It had been a few months now since the last time he was summoned to the First Building Of Dhol, and that time it was for a disciplinary hearing relating to a false accusation of theft. Whimsy recalled that last time with distaste, and wondered what Turaga Moneo had called him for now.
Whimsy was an Onu-Matoran, and a mining engineer. He thus made his dwelling under ground near the mine he worked at and near also to several similar dwellings inhabited by others who worked with him. It must be noted here that Whimsy was not his real name, but a rough English translation of the Matoran word for Whimsicality, which was very close to his name. However we shall use the word Whimsy to refer to him to save us time, as the Matoran word for whimsy and whimsicality involves sounds that cannot be produced with ease by a voice box that is not biomechanical.
As Whimsy walked up the steps to the entrance of the First Building, he began to speculate about what it might have been like to be in Toa Moneo's toa team- facing off Rahi whose programming had gone wrong of no fault of the Makuta who created them or of their own. He tried to picture the Toa trying to use basic hypnosis equipment to reprogram said Rahi to normalcy, given just how deviant they were- there were said to be Mukau that ate dirt, Brakas who thought they were Kane-Ra, and so on. And then Whimsy tried to sympathize with the feeling of agony and torment the Toa felt as they were force to euthanize those Rahi who had gone all too far from the norm to be reprogrammed.
"Whoops!" Whimsy had been lost in his thoughts and nearly stepped on an acid slug. They were gentle, docile, organic creatures, and when stroked gently they would produce a diluted acid that has many uses, but if stroked too hard or crushed, the acid would spurt out of their soft bodies in a much more concentrated and toxic form, emitting fumes that could give a Muaka hallucinations.
"Spltphrzlle" was the sound emanated by the acid slug as it "ran" away from Whimsy's foot. It was only a sound it made out of alarm, but Whimsy had imagined it to be saying "WATCH IT, TROLL!", then he shook his head and reminded himself that the creature could not speak or use language as it was not a hnau (sentient being), and walked forward.
There were 112 steps in total on the staircase Whimsy had just climbed up. He imagined that if his friend Giila had been there too, she might have told him how much stone had went into making the staircase, the total surface area of the staircase, and possibly she would even make a reasonable estimate of the probability of one of the tiles in the staircase being loose. Giila was a Ga-matoran on the island of Dhol, and a mathematician, specifically she was an expert in the area of mathematics relating to statistics and probability. Whimsy noted that if Giila had been climbing the steps right now, she would probably make the mistake of stepping on an acid slug because she would be busy mentally calculating the probability that an acid slug egg would hatch into a red acid slug, and he chuckled.
It must be remembered that due to the nature of this writing and description, just describing Whimsy going up a staircase takes up a large number of words and makes you imagine the actual goings-on as being much longer than they actually are. He spent approximately 10 minutes going up those stairs (or 9 minutes, 58 seconds, and 10 microseconds as Giila would say it).
He faced the roughly hexagonal entrance into the First Building, and stepped forward. The entrance opened as he came in sight of the motion-sensor above it. Whimsy stepped inside.
The First Building had been the base of Moneo's toa team when they landed on Dhol, now Moneo's teammates had gone on to fulfill their destinies elsewhere in the universe, whilst Moneo was now Turaga and the administrator of Dhol, and consequently The First Building was now an administration building. Naturally, it had to be modified to be used as such, and the staircase and motion-sensing door, and the tablet in front that Whimsy had been reading were all later additions, mostly by the first wave of Matoran settlers on Dhol.
As Whimsy walked down the hallways, he dodged bureaucrat Matoran and the robots who assisted them as they zipped from department to department going about the daily business of governing Dhol, or more specifically, the Metru on Dhol. Unlike a certain other Metru, Dhol had been left with most of the natural environment of the island it was on intact, with the Matoran living mostly in a small city on the north-eastern coast.
Whimsy made his way to Moneo's office, talked to the autoreceptionist and sat himself in the waiting area just outside. A Le-matoran walked out of Moneo's chambers clutching a small hexagonal badge. The autoreceptionist informed Whimsy he may walk in, which he did.
As Whimsy entered the room, he noticed that apart from Moneo's badge of office on the wall, a map of Dhol, and a big window behind Moneo's desk, which was littered with paper and stationary, the room was totally unremarkable. Whimsy recalled tales of Turaga Dume in Metru Nui and the expansive office he kept which was supposedly filled with such things that few Matoran ever see in their lifetimes.
Turaga Moneo peered up from his work and looked at Whimsy, and said "Ah, greetings Whimsy" as he set down his pen and got up from his desk. Whimsy responded with "greetings, Turaga Moneo." There was a short pause, which was broken by Moneo saying "You're probably thinking why I have called you here", which Whimsy was indeed doing, alongside some idle speculation about what might happen if a duck rahi crashed through the window again like the last time he was in Moneo's office.
"Would you like to know why I have called you here?" asked Moneo, to which Whimsy responded "yes, please, sir. May I know why?", whilst suppressing laughter at the thought of Moneo at a council meeting trying to explain why a duck rahi is sitting on his head.
Moneo noticed the suppression, and looked at Whimsy- black armor with purple bits, purple kanohi pakari, his hammer (a sort of badge of office or a uniform, much like a fireman's helmet) hanging by his side from a belt he was wearing, his golden searchlight eyes, and a multicolored robe open in the front that suggested that the person who wore it was either some sort of magician, insane or simply very imaginative. When Moneo first witnessed Whimsy suppressing laughter whilst talking to him, he assumed that Whimsy knew something he didn't or was plotting something sinister, then he assumed Whimsy was crazy, now he just wondered what mental image Whimsy's mind had thrown up that was apparently so funny "something about a duck, maybe?" he thought.
"Look outside this window", Moneo pointed to the window behind his desk, and walked towards it, Whimsy followed him, and it became clear why Moneo had asked him to look out this window- it was aligned so that the island of Dhol's most impressive and unusual geographic feature- a strange protrusion bigger than a hill but smaller than a mountain that was shaped rather like a dhol, a type of drum; it stood splat in the middle of the island and according to old tales spread by Matoran of Dhol it may once have been part of the sky.
Moneo said "when my team first came to Dhol, we named it for this drum-like feature. The Deviant Rahi never came near it, for it emitted an energy field that would repel them from it. It was so strong, that no grass grew within 0.1 kio of the field, and some of the machines would fail. Now look- there's grass and vines crawling up it. Whimsy, I want you on the team to excavate into the Dhol and see what's inside. See if it can be developed a little into something useful."
Whimsy stared at Moneo in a sort of shock- the last time he talked to Moneo on the subject of the environment, he had been intent on "preserving the universe in the state in which it was given to us as a blessing from Our Lords And Creators (the great beings), modifying it only out of great necessity" which is why he permitted mining "only at certain distances belowground where it will not drastically change the flow of elements on the surface of this island". Whimsy then realized how long ago that conversation had been- enough time for the personalities and long-held opinions of even the most stubborn of hnau to change, and for the complex nerves and muscles of a dead Kraata to disintegrate completely into a pile of Artidermis dust which vanished slowly as the wind and the light spread the dust across the universe.
Moneo asked "will you accept this task?". Whimsy nodded a confident yes- "this sounds fun" he thought. Moneo said "excellent! report to the Dhol excavation base camp tomorrow at Faijr("the time that dark ends and light begins" used mostly to refer to the day/night cycle). Here is your badge of office and some of the research material relating to the surface of the Dhol" Moneo handed Whimsy a hexagonal badge similar to the one the Le-matoran he saw earlier had been holding, and a pamphlet that summarized the basic findings of the research, and identified the researchers responsible as staff of "Foundation labs"- Whimsy recalled that this was the laboratory high up in the mountains of Dhol (which were fairly ordinary compared to other mountains in the BIONICLE universe) where Giila worked- she was amongst the few Ga-matoran employed there and thus one of the few who got the privilege of working with Ko-matoran and seeing beyond the cold, uncaring, and silent facade the Ko-matoran had and witnessing firsthand the intelligence, logic and thinking skills that Ko-matoran had been gifted with.
"Yes sir!" said Whimsy, and he left the room and walked into the waiting room as a bulky crimson Ta-matoran with a cigar in his mouth walked in. Whimsy flinched a little at the sight of him- this particular Ta-matoran was named Mallow, and he represented the traits that others disliked about Ta-matoran- hot-tempered, violent, arrogant, stubborn, words that burnt you to a crisp, and somewhat "scarey". Whimsy had the ill fortune to get on his bad side and ended up getting branded with the words "GAFNA DROPPINGS" on his backside last year. Mallow was, like many Ta-matoran on this island, smoking "mairaj"- a blue-glowing powder formed from the seeds of a plant first encountered on Dhol that burnt with a very pleasant smell emitting a smoke that had the affect of uplifting those who inhaled it into a somewhat more aware, more enlightened state to varying degrees- Whimsy remembered a Ko-matoran who had tried mairaj on a dare claiming he could see the universe in the way Mata-Nui did, and that the smoke smelled nice but tasted horribly bitter. Thankfully he did not see or acknowledge Whimsy's presence and walked into the office, removing and concealing the cigar from his mouth before he did so- Moneo forbade mairaj smoke in his office.
Whimsy was on the tram that would take him to the area where the entrance to the underground dwelling complex lay- it was somewhere on the outskirts of town, and the entrance was a series of sausage-shaped levitating elevators that would go down to the reception area of the dwelling complex. Whimsy encountered Giila on the tram- she did not notice Whimsy and was wearing a placid expression, and was standing very still- a sign that she was busy calculating something- very busy. Whimsy could almost hear (or was it imagine?) her brain making a mechanical whirrrrrrrrrrrrrrr as she crunched numbers. Whimsy saw that some prankster had taken advantage of Giila's "math-trance" to scribble "COLD WET FISH" on her- the calculation must have been exceedingly complex for the prankster to have done that and apparently escape. Suddenly Giila blinked twice and looked around and saw Whimsy standing there- he had made the mistake of standing too close when she got out of her math-trance and was mistaken for an assaulter or a Rahi- she squeaked and jumped a little, then delivered a punch to Whimsy's chest, which made him recoil backwards into a Po-matoran who was reading a magazine that was running a news article on the Skakdi embassador Roodaka- he fell forward and did an action that looked rather like he was kissing the image of Roodaka in the publication as he fell. Whimsy turned around and said "Terribly sorry there Rakas, didn't know you were behind me" and helped the Po-matoran up, who said "Mata Nui! Can't you be a little more careful Whimsy? Big oaf." Whimsy cringed a little- he was the largest matoran on Dhol, and he disliked being reminded of it. Giila said "Whimsy! I'm sorry, are you okay?" Whimsy said "I'm fine, Giila." Giila looked at herself and saw the "COLD WET FISH" scribbled all over her. "did you do this, Whimsy?" Whimsy said "no." then he recognized the handwriting and pointed to a Le-matoran, standing next to Giila, who was wearing a wide smile. He raised his hand and said "guilty".
Whimsy asked "what were you thinking there, Giila?" Giila responded "hm? Oh nothing, just some work I was taking home from the lab, but I decided to finish it here." Then she noticed the Hexagonal badge Whimsy had and said "hey! You too?" and presented a similar badge. Whimsy nodded. "that's great! My whole research team's on the project, they're going to be at the camp tomorrow!" she said. The tram came to a halt, and a speaker announced that they had arrived at the Miner's Dwelling Complex. Whimsy said "here's my stop. See you tomorrow Giila" and got off the tram as Giila waved goodbye to him.
Whimsy walked into an elevator and went down. The mental image of Turaga Moneo with a duck sitting on his head sitting sage-like at the top of the dhol appeared. Whimsy laughed.
CHAPTER 1
"Twas in the 5073rd year of Our Great Spirit that this now beauteous island of Dhol was blessed by a visit of a squadron of Toa who set foot here with the objective of cleaning the island of Deviants and of establishing a Matoran community with the assistance of Matoran from other lands" So read the inscription on the slab that Whimsy was standing in front of. It had been a few months now since the last time he was summoned to the First Building Of Dhol, and that time it was for a disciplinary hearing relating to a false accusation of theft. Whimsy recalled that last time with distaste, and wondered what Turaga Moneo had called him for now.
Whimsy was an Onu-Matoran, and a mining engineer. He thus made his dwelling under ground near the mine he worked at and near also to several similar dwellings inhabited by others who worked with him. It must be noted here that Whimsy was not his real name, but a rough English translation of the Matoran word for Whimsicality, which was very close to his name. However we shall use the word Whimsy to refer to him to save us time, as the Matoran word for whimsy and whimsicality involves sounds that cannot be produced with ease by a voice box that is not biomechanical.
As Whimsy walked up the steps to the entrance of the First Building, he began to speculate about what it might have been like to be in Toa Moneo's toa team- facing off Rahi whose programming had gone wrong of no fault of the Makuta who created them or of their own. He tried to picture the Toa trying to use basic hypnosis equipment to reprogram said Rahi to normalcy, given just how deviant they were- there were said to be Mukau that ate dirt, Brakas who thought they were Kane-Ra, and so on. And then Whimsy tried to sympathize with the feeling of agony and torment the Toa felt as they were force to euthanize those Rahi who had gone all too far from the norm to be reprogrammed.
"Whoops!" Whimsy had been lost in his thoughts and nearly stepped on an acid slug. They were gentle, docile, organic creatures, and when stroked gently they would produce a diluted acid that has many uses, but if stroked too hard or crushed, the acid would spurt out of their soft bodies in a much more concentrated and toxic form, emitting fumes that could give a Muaka hallucinations.
"Spltphrzlle" was the sound emanated by the acid slug as it "ran" away from Whimsy's foot. It was only a sound it made out of alarm, but Whimsy had imagined it to be saying "WATCH IT, TROLL!", then he shook his head and reminded himself that the creature could not speak or use language as it was not a hnau (sentient being), and walked forward.
There were 112 steps in total on the staircase Whimsy had just climbed up. He imagined that if his friend Giila had been there too, she might have told him how much stone had went into making the staircase, the total surface area of the staircase, and possibly she would even make a reasonable estimate of the probability of one of the tiles in the staircase being loose. Giila was a Ga-matoran on the island of Dhol, and a mathematician, specifically she was an expert in the area of mathematics relating to statistics and probability. Whimsy noted that if Giila had been climbing the steps right now, she would probably make the mistake of stepping on an acid slug because she would be busy mentally calculating the probability that an acid slug egg would hatch into a red acid slug, and he chuckled.
It must be remembered that due to the nature of this writing and description, just describing Whimsy going up a staircase takes up a large number of words and makes you imagine the actual goings-on as being much longer than they actually are. He spent approximately 10 minutes going up those stairs (or 9 minutes, 58 seconds, and 10 microseconds as Giila would say it).
He faced the roughly hexagonal entrance into the First Building, and stepped forward. The entrance opened as he came in sight of the motion-sensor above it. Whimsy stepped inside.
The First Building had been the base of Moneo's toa team when they landed on Dhol, now Moneo's teammates had gone on to fulfill their destinies elsewhere in the universe, whilst Moneo was now Turaga and the administrator of Dhol, and consequently The First Building was now an administration building. Naturally, it had to be modified to be used as such, and the staircase and motion-sensing door, and the tablet in front that Whimsy had been reading were all later additions, mostly by the first wave of Matoran settlers on Dhol.
As Whimsy walked down the hallways, he dodged bureaucrat Matoran and the robots who assisted them as they zipped from department to department going about the daily business of governing Dhol, or more specifically, the Metru on Dhol. Unlike a certain other Metru, Dhol had been left with most of the natural environment of the island it was on intact, with the Matoran living mostly in a small city on the north-eastern coast.
Whimsy made his way to Moneo's office, talked to the autoreceptionist and sat himself in the waiting area just outside. A Le-matoran walked out of Moneo's chambers clutching a small hexagonal badge. The autoreceptionist informed Whimsy he may walk in, which he did.
As Whimsy entered the room, he noticed that apart from Moneo's badge of office on the wall, a map of Dhol, and a big window behind Moneo's desk, which was littered with paper and stationary, the room was totally unremarkable. Whimsy recalled tales of Turaga Dume in Metru Nui and the expansive office he kept which was supposedly filled with such things that few Matoran ever see in their lifetimes.
Turaga Moneo peered up from his work and looked at Whimsy, and said "Ah, greetings Whimsy" as he set down his pen and got up from his desk. Whimsy responded with "greetings, Turaga Moneo." There was a short pause, which was broken by Moneo saying "You're probably thinking why I have called you here", which Whimsy was indeed doing, alongside some idle speculation about what might happen if a duck rahi crashed through the window again like the last time he was in Moneo's office.
"Would you like to know why I have called you here?" asked Moneo, to which Whimsy responded "yes, please, sir. May I know why?", whilst suppressing laughter at the thought of Moneo at a council meeting trying to explain why a duck rahi is sitting on his head.
Moneo noticed the suppression, and looked at Whimsy- black armor with purple bits, purple kanohi pakari, his hammer (a sort of badge of office or a uniform, much like a fireman's helmet) hanging by his side from a belt he was wearing, his golden searchlight eyes, and a multicolored robe open in the front that suggested that the person who wore it was either some sort of magician, insane or simply very imaginative. When Moneo first witnessed Whimsy suppressing laughter whilst talking to him, he assumed that Whimsy knew something he didn't or was plotting something sinister, then he assumed Whimsy was crazy, now he just wondered what mental image Whimsy's mind had thrown up that was apparently so funny "something about a duck, maybe?" he thought.
"Look outside this window", Moneo pointed to the window behind his desk, and walked towards it, Whimsy followed him, and it became clear why Moneo had asked him to look out this window- it was aligned so that the island of Dhol's most impressive and unusual geographic feature- a strange protrusion bigger than a hill but smaller than a mountain that was shaped rather like a dhol, a type of drum; it stood splat in the middle of the island and according to old tales spread by Matoran of Dhol it may once have been part of the sky.
Moneo said "when my team first came to Dhol, we named it for this drum-like feature. The Deviant Rahi never came near it, for it emitted an energy field that would repel them from it. It was so strong, that no grass grew within 0.1 kio of the field, and some of the machines would fail. Now look- there's grass and vines crawling up it. Whimsy, I want you on the team to excavate into the Dhol and see what's inside. See if it can be developed a little into something useful."
Whimsy stared at Moneo in a sort of shock- the last time he talked to Moneo on the subject of the environment, he had been intent on "preserving the universe in the state in which it was given to us as a blessing from Our Lords And Creators (the great beings), modifying it only out of great necessity" which is why he permitted mining "only at certain distances belowground where it will not drastically change the flow of elements on the surface of this island". Whimsy then realized how long ago that conversation had been- enough time for the personalities and long-held opinions of even the most stubborn of hnau to change, and for the complex nerves and muscles of a dead Kraata to disintegrate completely into a pile of Artidermis dust which vanished slowly as the wind and the light spread the dust across the universe.
Moneo asked "will you accept this task?". Whimsy nodded a confident yes- "this sounds fun" he thought. Moneo said "excellent! report to the Dhol excavation base camp tomorrow at Faijr("the time that dark ends and light begins" used mostly to refer to the day/night cycle). Here is your badge of office and some of the research material relating to the surface of the Dhol" Moneo handed Whimsy a hexagonal badge similar to the one the Le-matoran he saw earlier had been holding, and a pamphlet that summarized the basic findings of the research, and identified the researchers responsible as staff of "Foundation labs"- Whimsy recalled that this was the laboratory high up in the mountains of Dhol (which were fairly ordinary compared to other mountains in the BIONICLE universe) where Giila worked- she was amongst the few Ga-matoran employed there and thus one of the few who got the privilege of working with Ko-matoran and seeing beyond the cold, uncaring, and silent facade the Ko-matoran had and witnessing firsthand the intelligence, logic and thinking skills that Ko-matoran had been gifted with.
"Yes sir!" said Whimsy, and he left the room and walked into the waiting room as a bulky crimson Ta-matoran with a cigar in his mouth walked in. Whimsy flinched a little at the sight of him- this particular Ta-matoran was named Mallow, and he represented the traits that others disliked about Ta-matoran- hot-tempered, violent, arrogant, stubborn, words that burnt you to a crisp, and somewhat "scarey". Whimsy had the ill fortune to get on his bad side and ended up getting branded with the words "GAFNA DROPPINGS" on his backside last year. Mallow was, like many Ta-matoran on this island, smoking "mairaj"- a blue-glowing powder formed from the seeds of a plant first encountered on Dhol that burnt with a very pleasant smell emitting a smoke that had the affect of uplifting those who inhaled it into a somewhat more aware, more enlightened state to varying degrees- Whimsy remembered a Ko-matoran who had tried mairaj on a dare claiming he could see the universe in the way Mata-Nui did, and that the smoke smelled nice but tasted horribly bitter. Thankfully he did not see or acknowledge Whimsy's presence and walked into the office, removing and concealing the cigar from his mouth before he did so- Moneo forbade mairaj smoke in his office.
Whimsy was on the tram that would take him to the area where the entrance to the underground dwelling complex lay- it was somewhere on the outskirts of town, and the entrance was a series of sausage-shaped levitating elevators that would go down to the reception area of the dwelling complex. Whimsy encountered Giila on the tram- she did not notice Whimsy and was wearing a placid expression, and was standing very still- a sign that she was busy calculating something- very busy. Whimsy could almost hear (or was it imagine?) her brain making a mechanical whirrrrrrrrrrrrrrr as she crunched numbers. Whimsy saw that some prankster had taken advantage of Giila's "math-trance" to scribble "COLD WET FISH" on her- the calculation must have been exceedingly complex for the prankster to have done that and apparently escape. Suddenly Giila blinked twice and looked around and saw Whimsy standing there- he had made the mistake of standing too close when she got out of her math-trance and was mistaken for an assaulter or a Rahi- she squeaked and jumped a little, then delivered a punch to Whimsy's chest, which made him recoil backwards into a Po-matoran who was reading a magazine that was running a news article on the Skakdi embassador Roodaka- he fell forward and did an action that looked rather like he was kissing the image of Roodaka in the publication as he fell. Whimsy turned around and said "Terribly sorry there Rakas, didn't know you were behind me" and helped the Po-matoran up, who said "Mata Nui! Can't you be a little more careful Whimsy? Big oaf." Whimsy cringed a little- he was the largest matoran on Dhol, and he disliked being reminded of it. Giila said "Whimsy! I'm sorry, are you okay?" Whimsy said "I'm fine, Giila." Giila looked at herself and saw the "COLD WET FISH" scribbled all over her. "did you do this, Whimsy?" Whimsy said "no." then he recognized the handwriting and pointed to a Le-matoran, standing next to Giila, who was wearing a wide smile. He raised his hand and said "guilty".
Whimsy asked "what were you thinking there, Giila?" Giila responded "hm? Oh nothing, just some work I was taking home from the lab, but I decided to finish it here." Then she noticed the Hexagonal badge Whimsy had and said "hey! You too?" and presented a similar badge. Whimsy nodded. "that's great! My whole research team's on the project, they're going to be at the camp tomorrow!" she said. The tram came to a halt, and a speaker announced that they had arrived at the Miner's Dwelling Complex. Whimsy said "here's my stop. See you tomorrow Giila" and got off the tram as Giila waved goodbye to him.
Whimsy walked into an elevator and went down. The mental image of Turaga Moneo with a duck sitting on his head sitting sage-like at the top of the dhol appeared. Whimsy laughed.